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How to Help People Get Unstuck: 3 Powerful but Simple Actions

StrategyDriven Managing Your People Article |Help people get unstuck|How to Help People Get Unstuck: 3 Powerful but Simple ActionsIndividual and organizational change can be difficult. Each time we go through any sort of change, some of us jump into it with seeming glee. Yet others seem to be held back by the very notion.

In the business world, this is often termed resistance. Moreover, business leaders often go on to tell us that our resistance is irrational or a misunderstanding. Some “experts” will even tell us that the reason we struggle against change is that all the change we see makes us exhausted. But it is not resistance, and it is not exhaustion that makes us resist change. Quite simply, we are stuck.

Getting stuck is a biological response to change that is rarely explored and even more rarely acknowledged in business and work. We build entire algorithms, schema, or mental models around how to navigate our worlds that are deeply wired into our brains. When a change comes along, it requires us to rewire these algorithms. And we don’t want to. We get stuck because our brains get attached to the way things are today.

MEL: The 3 components of our limbic system

More specifically, we have a part of our brain known as the limbic system that is responsible for writing these algorithms. It writes the code not in a computer’s zeros and ones, but rather in three key subcomponents — memory, emotion, and learning. We call this MEL. Every time we learn something new, experience a strong emotion, or create a lasting memory, we develop a new piece of MEL that stays with us and triggers again in a similar situation.

MEL is certainly helpful for navigating the physical world. For instance, it helps us drive to work every day, recognize certain faces, and even read emotions. It is even useful for building connections among our peers, colleagues, and family members. We use the same process to write positive (and sometimes negative) memories into MEL along with the associated emotions to remind us how to respond to certain people that we love and maybe even those we dislike. We also use MEL to build affinities for organizations. It is the core of organizational culture, as we take the positive emotions felt by certain behaviors in an organization and replicate them throughout the organization. These are all positive ways we build and develop MEL for life.


The challenge of getting unstuck

The downside is that MEL does not easily adapt. People feel uncertainty about the future because changes directly challenge MEL. As we consider something new, the positive emotions of the past are replaced with concern, fear, and even anxiety. These negative emotions manifest themselves in the workplace in the form of low morale, reduced motivation, and a decline in productivity (among others). Employees shut. down and get stuck. In turn, organizations get stuck as well.

So, how do we help people get unstuck? Three simple actions:

1. Start where people start

In order to re-code MEL (memories, emotions, and learning), you can’t start with data, logic, and strategy. As important as it is for any person to ultimately understand the business need for a change, it’s far more compelling and effective to meet them where they start: with memories, emotions, and learning. This means acknowledging and embracing the past — positive and negative — as part of developing a change initiative. Use effective storytelling, and create connection among people and the organization to drive change rather than simply rely on incentives.

2. Acknowledge uncertainty

The uncertain feeling people experience in the fact of change is really a feeling of loss. Their MEL is challenged by something new, and it registers as a loss. Having an empathetic response means acknowledging this loss and helping people move through the change process with support. Leaders need to accept that change is hard, explain why it is hard for them as well, and share the pain of change with their team members.

3. Re-write MEL

The only way for people to truly become unstuck is to write create new memories with positive emotions around a change. This can be encouraged through learning to help people feel what life will be like in a coming change. Strong communications can help build new emotional connections, and new positive memories can be developed through reward systems and incentives that help people feel appreciated and valued.

Organizations are inundated with change: it’s become such a part of the way business is done lately that it can seem like the new normal. Viewing change as just part of the working world, however, can set an organization up for failure — as its people shut down facing the prospect of whatever comes next. Understanding the dynamics of MEL, and using empathy and communication, can help bring your team around. And once a team has embraced and prevailed through change, it has that skill as part of its own toolkit. Adapting to change is far less daunting when you’ve gone through it once already.


About the Authors

Dr. Victoria M. Grady is the president of PivotPoint. She directs the MSM Graduate Program, is on the faculty of George Mason University, and is a research consultant at Dixon Hughes Goodman (DHG). She’s an expert on organizational change, working with public and private agencies across the globe. Patrick McCreesh, PhD is the managing partner of Simatree, a strategy, analytics, and technology consultancy. He leads teams through digital transformations and has developed analytics programs across the public sector and Fortune 500 clients. He also serves as adjunct faculty at Georgetown University and George Mason University Business School. Dr. Victoria M. Grady and Patrick McCreesh, PhD are the authors of Stuck: How to Win at Work by Understanding Loss.

Accepting What Is and Creating Your Future

StrategyDriven Practices for Professionals Article |Creating your future|Accepting What Is and Creating Your FutureGiven all the unprecedented challenges businesses have been dealing with in the past two years, I support you and your organization in having a fantastic second half of 2022 instead of another six months of survival mode.

Given the Challenges such as rising fuel prices the supply chain, COVID-19, inflation and on and on, you ask, What the heck are you talking about? How can I have a fantastic second half with all that going on? Simply put, what if you and your organization chose to embrace the present and stopped resisting the past? I am inviting you not to resist what you are dealing with and simply engage in having a remarkable rest of the year.

An opportunity that I had during the pandemic is being able to see organizations and their various responses to the Pandemic. A case in point are three commercial Uniform laundry and delivery companies that reacted differently to the Pandemic. One thing about these companies, that even in a pandemic, people need their products delivered to their door. So, the plants ran, the trucks delivered, and the organizations functioned as best they could.

In the first example, the Leadership really took on COVID-19. This was led by the Owner/CEO. Even before the lockdown, they were researching and learning about COVID-19. Early on, when COVID-19 was just in Wuhan, one of their executives raised a flag of concern and the rest of the leadership group began to study what was happening. Once Lockdown occurred, they embraced the Pandemic. There was no denial or resistance. Of all the companies that I worked with, they were the most initiative-taking in securing a safe and functioning workplace. They took on having their company continue to run and deliver great service to their customers and to the greatest extent possible supply a safe, healthy work environment.

This company is in the middle of one of the largest American cities. COVID-19 was prevalent and surrounded them. Real time was spent communicating on Zoom and face to face. Real money was spent on air filtration systems. As knowledge was gathered on COVID-19, it was applied. The best ideas on how to social distance and use zones for bathroom coordination were studied and adopted.

There were challenges and definite hiccups. With that said, profitability improved. The scores from customers in their annual survey all were at their highest levels. Their sales force made their numbers, and they added several new accounts.

One thing that stood out is that the employees of this company were demonstrably appreciative of how the owner and the leaders went to every length to have a safe and healthy environment. The employees were appreciative of being able to work in a company that took on dealing with COVID-19 seriously and in the most initiative-taking and safest way possible. The leadership team supported employees as they dealt with their families and COVID. Even though some co-workers have left, retention has been high. Hiring has been challenging and workable. Interestingly, the frontline has remained stable.

The second example is of a company that was not as initiative-taking or fast moving as the first. They were dealing with COVID-19 circumstances and engaged. However, they were not as engaged as the first company. This company reacted to COVID-19. They did not embrace the challenge of COVID-19. There was resistance and confusion. They certainly muddled through.

This company is rurally found where COVID-19 was not as present. Money was not spent like in the first example. Communication did not happen, and the company got through COVID-19. Deliveries were always made, and the plant continued.

They did lose some customers, retention slipped, and sales decreased. Profits declined and the Sales Department had a tough time connecting with prospects and did not make its numbers. There was also higher than normal turnover. Given all that was going on, they did ok.

The third Company example is in an urban setting with COVID-19 present everywhere. They were not set up prior to the pandemic to work remotely and they struggled to get that set up. They struggled to get social distancing working, the offices safe and worked with protocols. There was resistance to dealing with COVID-19 and changing things. All the communication issues that were present before COVID-19 now occurred on steroids.

This company was hit by COVID-19 with many of the office staff getting it at the same time. I remember talking with one of the leadership group members from the hospital before he was put on a ventilator. The way COVID-19 ripped through the plant nearly prevented them from getting the trucks out and delivering. A competitor was called to see if they could cover for them and manage their deliveries.

Leadership tended to work at home and stay away. There was a big communication issue that occurred among the leadership team where executives threatened to quit. The GM, because of disastrous communication and what happened with direct reports was fired. Another top leader did not vaccinate and because of the state regulations, moved his family to Texas where he would work remotely. The CEO/Owner, after a traumatic and challenging two years, sold this company to a competitor.

Can you find your company in one of these three examples? What can you learn and apply from the above? I am supporting you in learning from the past, being present to right now, and complete with what has occurred.
The third quarter and beyond of 2022 is unwritten. However, the story of 2021 is written. It happened. Yet is it accepted and what does it mean to be accepted? Is the pandemic accepted? Is inflation accepted?
For many I say not. For many it seems as something wrong has happened, pandemic wrong, inflation wrong, fuel prices rising wrong. The incompletion and resistance as to what has happened before has you ensnarled… shackling you with a lack of freedom and power.

The rest of this year is unwritten. Every day is unwritten. While I can theoretically understand this, it is hard to live. What is it like to live your circumstances newly and to bring possibility to them? To hold them up to inspect, to look at them from a different frame, a unique perspective. What allows you to do that? Where does acceptance fit in? Where does creating and embracing fit in?
What if it is always possible to be engaged in a positive way? What if it is always positive to create anew if you are not resisting what is happening? Carl Jung said, “What you resist persists”. I find this idea to be useful in helping me see where I am stuck.

Part of resistance is a notion that whatever is happening should not be. Resistance, rather than embracing what is, gets in the way of acceptance and again, for me, stops any notion of being free to take new creative actions.

From the examples that I have presented of the three organizations and their differing responses to COVID-19 and other challenges, I think the power of choosing and embracing what you are dealing with is clear. You can see how resistance and just muddling through can be disempowering and produces subpar results.

Choosing it the way it is, is an action that allows for being present and for new possibilities. Then acceptance allows for lessons from the past to be learned, the past to be in the past and for new actions to be taken. I am complete with COVID-19 and the many challenges of the last two years. I am choosing to embrace the rest of 2022 exactly the way it is. From here, I am engaged in having a fantastic year.

I invite you to do the same from that place of acceptance and choosing to engage in having a fantastic rest of the year. I ask that you get your organizations to be accepting of whatever happened over the last two years, and from there create a powerful future to live into. Let us know how it goes and what you and your organizations are creating.


About the Author
StrategyDriven Expert Contributor | Bruce HodesBruce Hodes, President and Founder of CMI, is dedicated to helping companies grow. The focus of his work is developing work teams, business leaders and executives into powerful performers. Bruce has an MBA from Northwestern University and a Master’s Degree in Clinical Social Work.

Recommended Resource – The Pivot Point

The Pivot Point: Success in Organizational Change

by Victoria M. Grady
and James D. Grady

About the Book

The Pivot Point by Drs. Victoria and James Grady is a business novel presenting a unique perspective on effectively implementing organizational change based on group and individual psychodynamics. Within their book, Victoria and James examine decades of research into the ways individuals cope with loss and then relate these principles to the business environment. They conclude by providing methods for identifying and dealing with group and individual loss factors and reactions such that the desired organizational change can be implemented with a minimal loss of organizational effectiveness and productivity.

Benefits of Using This Book

StrategyDriven Contributors like The Pivot Point for its unique perspective on the group and individual psychology associated with organizational change. Victoria and James’s point of view is deeply rooted in decades of sound academic research and refined by real world experiences. Not only did we find their assertions compelling, they matched our decades of group and individual observations and experiences.

The Pivot Point also provides methods for better dealing with these psychological challenges of change. The book prescribes implementable methods to address both the group and individual resistance factor in a constructive manner that is respectful of organizational personnel while at the same time progressive of the needed change. In some instances, however, change tools such as change readiness surveys appeared to lack the detail necessary to be immediately implementable and instead would require the services of Drs. Grady’s organization to complete. We would have preferred to have had the book be more complete in these areas.

The Pivot Point provides a refreshingly new perspective on making effective organizational change that is well aligned with the philosophies espoused by StrategyDriven. For this reason, The Pivot Point is a StrategyDriven recommended read.

StrategyDriven Podcast Special Edition 63 – An Interview with Victoria Grady, author of The Pivot Point

StrategyDriven Podcasts focus on the tools and techniques executives and managers can use to improve their organization’s alignment and accountability to ultimately achieve superior results. These podcasts elaborate on the best practice and warning flag articles on the StrategyDriven website.

Special Edition 63 – An Interview with Victoria Grady, author of The Pivot Point explores the psychology behind employees resistance to change and the actions leaders can take to more effectively move their organization to a state of high, post-change productivity. During our discussion, Victoria Grady, author of The Pivot Point: Success in Organizational Change, shares with us her insights and experiences regarding:

  • the underlying psychology driving employees resistance to change
  • observable differences in employee behaviors as driven by changing circumstances and the resulting organizational impacts
  • quantitative measurement of employees response to change and how this information can inform management’s change management efforts
  • actions leaders should take to better prepare their organization to overcome the resistance to change

Additional Information

In addition to the outstanding insights Victoria shares in The Pivot Point and this special edition podcast are the resources accessible from her website, www.PivotPnt.com. Victoria’s book, The Pivot Point, can be purchased by clicking here.

Victoria was recently featured by We Mean Business in an interviewed entitled Understanding Resistance. Click here to access this video.

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About the Author

Victoria Grady, author of The Pivot Point, is an Assistant Professorial Lecturer in the Department of Organizational Science within the Columbian School of Arts and Sciences at The George Washington University. Her consulting practice includes federal government institutions, nonprofit organizations, and private sector companies. To read Victoria’s complete biography, click here.

Leadership Inspirations – Moving Forward

“The only way organizations move forward is through change; begotten from fresh perspectives and new ideas.”

Nathan Ives
Principal Contributor and
Host, StrategyDriven Podcast